fading sparks
by TW0
Summary: The sparks mingled, embracing another and melting together until it wouldn't be able to tell which spark had belonged to the one and which to the other, but of course it didn't matter anymore. Their light shone only for a few more seconds, before they eventually diminished and then disappeared entirely.


They had seen how Thorin had gone down. Had seen how Ékurikel had tumbled in the air, when the spear had been thrust into their uncle's back, the daemon falling to the ground when silent surprise froze on her other half's face when the dwarf fell to his knees.

And now Fíli had to watch how the first thing Kíli did was to rush over to their king and uncle, uncaring of the danger, reckless just like he always was.

"NO!" Kíli had been the first to reach his side, standing over the dwarf he had known as a father for all his life. Olùmil in the form of a young panther at his side was growling at the oncoming orcs and goblins as if that could save them.

In an instance Fíli and Ûrzudul were beside them, slashing at the few orcs that dared to near them. But suddenly their enemies stayed clear and dread started to wallow up in Fíli's chest.

They heard the arrows coming before they saw them and by then it was too late.

Fíli heard how they clattered onto the battlefield around him, half laughing about the bad aim, when he suddenly heard several dull thuds and strangled gasp to his left. He flung himself around and what he saw made him forget about the battlefield, the arrows and Thorin all at once.

Kíli stood on shaking legs, several arrows protruding from his chest.

Disbelieving he looked up, his dark eyes meeting Fíli's blue ones for a second, before he crumbled.

He heard Ûrzudul howling before Fíli was even aware of opening his mouth to do the same. "KÍLI" but before he should reach his brother he too could feel a throbbing pain in his back and sides that made him stagger forward. But he couldn't stop to check what it was now. He had to reach Kíli.

When he finally reached his baby brother he fell to the ground without even wanting to do so, his legs too weak to carry him any further, but his arms were still strong enough to draw his brother into his arms, who had his own wound around his daemon.

Olùmil was shaking, stuck in the shape from earlier, without doubt not strong enough to shift his form again. It was seeing the daemon looking surprised at being stuck in the form of a black cat that sent fear rushing through Fíli like a wildfire.

They had only ever taken up that shape to be able to spar with Ûrzudul, joking that it would fit the younger daemon's name too well and that it was pretty much just like the opposite of Fíli's golden mountain lioness.

Like Kíli was his opposite in so many things.

"No, Kíli, you will be alright, you have to be alright." But Kíli couldn't speak.

There was an arrow in his throat and when he opened his mouth blood trickled over his chin and his eyes widened even more, staring up at his brother in terror. "We are scared" the panther spoke for the two of them and Fíli let out a strangled sob, reaching out to brush his hand over the animal's head.

Olùmil shuddered and Ûrzudul instinctively crawled closer to them, soft sounds of distress in her throat that only stopped, when Kíli wound his hair in thick fur of the mountain lioness.

Neither dwarf cared about the unspoken rules. It was too late for that.

"feehh" Kíli gurgled, choking on his own blood and Fíli's vision swam when he pressed his little brother and his daemon closer to his chest, ignoring how it made his own body throb and sting with pain.

"You cannot leave me. Please don't" his voice broke off and he couldn't do anything else but bury his head into Kíli's dark hair and his hands in Olùmil's fur. "It hurts." The panther cried, pushing itself into Kíli's embrace as much as Fíli's touch, seeking any kind of comfort that could make the pain he felt through his connection with his other half lessen.

Ûrzudul wailed at that and licked at Kíli's hands. "Don't leave us." It was terrible. Fíli had never felt more helpless in all his life and the pain from what he supposed were arrows stuck in his own body was nothing compared to the agony in his heart and soul.

"We could never leave you." Kíli's daemon whispered, pressing himself that tiny little bit closer into the embrace.

Kíli looked up at his brother, brown eyes red with tears meeting blue ones that were clouded with sorrow and Fíli didn't know what was worse, the quiet crying of the black cat in his arms or the silent tears that trickled down his little brother's face. "You will be alright." He whispered, despite knowing better and reached up to brush the tears away, resting his forehead against his brother's.

"You will be alright." He repeated when his own tears spilled over, dripping onto Kíli's face.

"I have found my form after all." Olùmil sighed, sounding strangely happy. "I never want to change again." The cat trembled and Fíli gripped the dark fur tighter, hanging on as if his life depended on it, feeling like it really did.

Kíli whimpered through a mouthful of blood, fumbling for Fíli's hand whilst his other wound itself through Ûrzudul's pelt, searching for reassurance. "It's alright, Kee." His own had shook when Fíli reached for his little brother's hand and squeezed it gently. Kíli's grip was faint. It had never been so faint.

"We love you" the panther's voice was suddenly pressing, as if he worried, that he didn't have enough time left to say the words.

"No please! You cannot go without us."

Fíli had felt Oúmil's words more than he had heard them, whispered into his chest, where the panther had buried his head under Kíli's chin and now his entire frame trembled like his hand which was gripping Kìli's as if he could keep him here if he hung on tighter. But Kíli had closed his eyes already his forehead furrowed as if he was thinking hard about something.

"NO! Kíli" on his pleading the younger dwarf looked up at Fíli again, blinking once, before his eyes suddenly went unseeing and Fíli felt Olùmil's fur slip from in between his fingers.

The panther was fading, hanging on for only a tiny second longer before it gently dissolved into a thousand golden sparks that caressed Fíli's hands and face before they scattered in the wind.

Fíli was left clinging to his brother's lifeless form and empty air.

Ûrzudul started to scream and howl and he joined in before he could think better, still clutching at Kíli, rooking him in his arms as if the motions could bring him back to life. As if it could bring back Olùmil.

Agonized they cried out their pain, for all the world to hear until their voices gave out.

They didn't know how long it was until they felt how their wounds started to take their toll on them too, Fíli only knew, that his own daemon had eventually crawled into his lap, settling over Kíli's legs where the panther had laid before.

"We will see them again." She muttered softly, nosing at her other half's throat.

Fíli could not even see her clearly anymore, he felt disconnected, his pain only intensified by their bond and the feeling of her warm body against his, whilst the one of his brother slowly turned cold in his arms.  
His throat was dry and sore when he finally found his voice again.

"You will find him, right?" he had heard of daemons that got lost on the way to Mahal's halls and Olùmil had ever been so young, so scared and his golden sparks had scattered so fast. The thought of his brother alone in the afterlife was something he couldn't bear. "I will." Ûrzudul said quietly, purring lowly in her belly to comfort him.

"I'm not scared." Fíli told her, but they both knew it was a lie.

He could feel the coldness creep up to him, darkness grasping for his senses, and he would be a fool to not be afraid.

As a response the lioness just inched closer to her other half, pressing her face against his neck and Fíli held her close with the hand that had let Olùmil slip away, whilst his other was still wound around his brother's shoulder. Slowly it got harder to breathe than before and despite himself Fíli felt his eyelids drooping, so that he had to force them to open again, to look at his daemon again, his own blue eyes meeting the grey-golden ones of the lion, both gazes hazy and unfocused.

Again he could feel fur slipping from his fingers, but he could not find the strength to hold on tighter.

He was not sure if his eyelids were falling closed again, but Ûrzudul was fading before his eyes as soft blackness enveloped him. The last thing he was aware of was a warm, golden burst and soft touches on his cheeks, before he plunged into darkness.


End file.
